getting out of the cycle
[Random day in late-september, a reminder to leave space for the unexpected.]
Today, I forgot my book at home. It disturbed my whole day; on the commute to campus, I was filled with worry that I would have no remedy for boredom. Carrying a book erases the possibility of doing nothing in liminal moments, from one occurrence to another: waiting for my next class, waiting for a friend, waiting for the bus. But this small disturbance opened me up to a realm of new possibilities for where my day could go. I noticed details about the world, and approached them with curiosity. Early morning, I grabbed a newspaper, found a book in the mini library that piqued my interest, and haunted a floor of the arts building I hadn't explored yet. In the attempt to optimize each portion of empty time, I get in my own way, preventing myself from experiencing each day fully and anew. I set myself up for mundane repetition. Boredom doesn't come from having nothing to do, but from the belief that there is nothing worth paying attention to in a particular instant.